Do you have a hard time showing imperfection? This was the prompt for the week. I have done a lot of thinking about this, honest thinking because the first thought that comes to mind is of course I don't because I don't have that many things to be imperfect about. [ oh for heaven's sake get real!]
Then I started to think about all the times I failed at things. Did I have a hard time sharing my failure. You bet I did. Just a small example was when I was teaching and had this hair brain idea of building a log cabin for Thanksgiving with 2nd graders out of rolled newspaper. Not just a small cabin but life size so the kids could fit inside It started out ok but it was past Thanksgiving before we would finish and I stayed late quite a few days finish the project so it wouldn't be a failure. [needless to say it wasn't in my lesson plans for the next year.]
How about the time I tried to sign a whole sermon to my deaf friend. No one but my friend and myself knew just what a terrible job I did. I sure wasn't telling anyone and she was too kind to tell the hearing folks at least.
Or my latest disaster was when I was working in the sound booth at church. My job is to make sure the words to the songs are on the screens and to change from the tape of the pastor to the live campus pastor. I forgot to watch the countdown and shut the tape off too quickly and the poor pastor and the worship team were racing to get back on stage to save the day. [yeah that is the way I roll, keeping everyone on their toes.]
Yeah, I have a difficult time saying to myself that I failed, and an even harder time letting others know that I have missed the mark entirely.
But as I have been reading Holley's daily words about how its ok to fail as NONE of us is perfect, I am slowly giving myself some slack. If you told me that the project you just tried was a total flop, I would be the first one to say "hey that's ok the next one you will have learned where the problems are and you will do so much better!" [by the way the church thing, NO ONE told me I was stupid or that I should probably not try to come back. Nope just reminded me to watch the clock so as not to cut the pastor off. That was Grace.] So why is it so hard for me to do the same for myself.
I am sure, like me, you don't want to look silly or stupid to those that are around you. I am finding that for the most part people are not waiting to pounce on our mistakes. Just as the Worship leader extended grace to me, or I would extend grace to you,so many others are just exactly the same. For those times in life where we fail miserably we need to remember that God is abounding in grace.